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Do's and Don'ts of Accepting Offers of Employment - NBA DRAFT VERSION...

I like hoops - a lot.  So I consumed 5 hours of NBA Draft coverage last night. Wow.

What did I learn?  I learned a lot about the right way to accept offers of employment.  I watched the draft with my sons (ages 14 and 11), and any time I watch things on TV with my boys, they have to listen to the world according to Kris Dunn.  They're lucky like that.

Three lessons from the NBA Draft related to reacting to offers and marketing yourself as a candidate (click through for the GIFs and Videos if you can't see them - it's 100% worth your time):

1. First up, you really need to act like you've been there before. DO NOT BREAK INTO A HUGE SOUL SHAKE ROUTINE WITH A PERSON TWICE YOUR AGE. Also, if you're a parent of new grad accpeting an offer, resist the urge to helicopter in or do anything to jeopardize your kid's ability to be taken seriously by his future employer.

Nik Stauskas, drafted 8th overall by the Sacramento Kings, failed this test.  So did his dad.  Watch the clip below and see me afterwards for an explanation. 

Yep - that's Nik performing a planned routine/soulshake with a degree of difficulty of 8.2  More importantly, the dude he's doing it with is his dad.  And yes, it ended with both of them throwing up 3-goggles (Click here for an explanation of 3-goggles).  As a former caucasian guard, I can tell you that the world will give you the latitude of the soul shake and 3-Goggles if you make it in pro hoops.  Your dad does not need to be part of the process.

Reminds me of this article on Johnny Manziel where his dad is sharing stories of togetherness with Johnny Football and is proud of their exploits that included double punches in the nuts as a father/son activity.

Me thinks Dad needs to be the grown up.

2. Next - If you're good enough to be drafted in the NBA, make sure your resume/video montage includes a large degree of self-confidence.  A GREAT WAY TO SHOW SWAGGER IS TO HAVE THE DEEP HEAD NOD AS YOU TURN TOWARD THE CAMERA LIKE YOU ARE BOUNCING TO AN ASAP ROCKY CUT.  PJ Hariston has it down - see the clip below for proof and focus on seconds :02 through :04:

That's confidence people.  No doubts exist in PJ. 

3. If the only employment that's available exists at a place you don't want to work, resist the urge to curse right after the offer has been delivered verbally.  Not a lot of basketball players want to work in Minnesota these days, including Zach Lavine from UCLA.  Watch his lips for the "f me".

Whoops!

So to sum up the learning for the Dunn brothers from the draft:

1. I'm not soul shaking/3-goggling with you during the most important moments of your life.

2. Understated Swagger isn't all bad.

3. Don't drop F-bombs on the phone when someone makes you a verbal offer.

My kids love having me drop the HR knowledge on them while we watch sports.  DVR and rewind has made it our own personal classroom.

Comments

MattL

I can definitely identify with the kids loving hearing life lessons from their ole man.

My 15-year old daughter LOVES me dishing out 70s/80s trivia when we're watching the tube. She just can't get enough of it. I think she probably brags to her friends about me being able to play the Hogan's Heroes theme on trombone too (note to self, update CV).

Now we need a column about biting in the workplace. Not OK in kindergarten. Not OK at work.

--M

Laurie Ruettimann

I can't wait until your boys write tell-all books.

Leah Brecker

For #3 with Zach LaVine it seems he is saying "F man", like he is in disbelief he was just drafted. I don't view it as he was upset he was going to Minnesota. However, dropping the F bomb was inappropriate.

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