Become a Better Manager By Losing More Arguments...

It's pretty simple when you stop to think about it.

Want to be a great manager?  Your style doesn't matter.  You can be the a##hole, the nice boss, the loud gal, the meek mouse, whatever.  The secret is the same.

You have to be able to let a direct report win once in awhile when you disagree, even when you know you're right.

It starts by being willing to have a conversation with the folks you manage.  Not you talking or thinking about what you're going to say next while they're talking.  Actually listening to what they're saying.

When you see that they're really passionate about how they want to handle a situation, let them do it their way once in awhile. Especially if you've told them you recommend they do something else.

Why? A funny thing happens when the folks you manage see that you're OK with them doing something other than what you recommend. They feel more like a peer, which opens up a lot of doors. Most notably, they become more receptive to your feedback when you MUST have them do it your way. 

Stop thinking it has to be done your way every time. 

Advantage = You.

Comments

[Account Deleted]

i agree with this 100% or more if possible. one comment that pops up tho is that hierarchical structures are often so severely enforced that it seems getting a direct report to show some small sign of gumption and creativity is a fairly rare thing, at least in my experience. all too often the "culture" (read: fear of control loss) does the managing and represses individual creativity from the get-go. so many people are conditioned into just following orders that a fair amount of remedial training in "going counter to authority" is necessary, or am i a statistical outlier?

just what i see in my lens . . .

[John Garrett]

I'm curious to how you think said manager should respond if the team member then fails. I spend a lot of time letting people make mistakes, but I'd love to hear how you would handle the situation once a person fails.

Do you team from it? Do you use it to gain influence? Do you not let them "win" again?

Great blog by the way. . .

[Vicky Cullison]

I suspect that after employees make their own mistakes and management's initial recommendations are proven to be correct, those employees will learn to trust their leaders' judgements. And respect would be a natural product from this kind of management style.